Life in 2009 has been different. Really different. Different good, and different bad.
My last post still rings in my mind…I’m totally changing. There is an inner turmoil that comes with change though. I’m reflective, contemplative, maybe even a little melancholy. Yet I feel like I’m on the brink of something exciting, something worth working for. I know it’s worth the feelings I have right now, but there are moments where I wish I could go back, stop this metamorphosis. It would be so much more comfortable to go with the status quo. But I totally believe that God’s not finished with me yet.
Spring for us always brings to life changes. Four of our five children celebrate their birthday’s. Which has been an incredible honor to watch them all grow. Logan turned 8, Justus 3, Faith 1 and Emma celebrates her second birthday next week. I feel God’s richest blessings through all our children. I’m amazed at the complexity of their being, amazed at the differences and similarities.
This spring also brought us heartache. Early in April, Steve’s mom found out she had cancer and just three short weeks later she passed away. It has been difficult, letting go. Although I know she is in a better place where she’s no longer in pain and discomfort, she is able to dance and eat. She is free from all the things that bound her here on earth. My difficulty is selfish. I never got to tell her one last time how much I loved her, how special she was, how thankful I am that she accepted me into her family. I will miss her, her sarcasm, her laugh and even her stubbornness!
We also added to our family this Spring. No, there are no more children under the Bedard roof, but there is another child in the fold. We have talked a lot about sponsoring a child for a long time, and I went ahead and added an addition, in honor of Steve’s mom. Flora from Tanzania is now loved and prayed for by each member of the Bedard family. We’re really looking forward to getting to know her better, and writing to her…I hope each day that our package from Compassion will arrive so we can begin our relationship with her. That she’ll know that a big family from Canada loves her and prays for her, that we will do all we can to see her thrive and overcome.
